Stress Response

Like many people, in times of stress I often reach for food to provide the comfort I so desperately crave.  Everyone has their own vice... for me it's chocolate.  Any form of  chocolate I can get my hands on (as long as there is no nuts).  And as I sit here feeling like crap after eating a huge bowl of vanilla ice cream with chocolate sauce I am starting to realize that this response to stress is one of the major obsticals I face in my goals for creating a healthier life.

Unfortunately stress isn't something that I am likely to eliminate from my life anytime soon.  I am a Stay at Home mother to a wonderful 4 month old, wife to an amazing future Physician Assistant who is in the midst of his Clinical rotations and is rarely home.  Having almost the entire responsibility for child care, cooking, cleaning, and all other responsibilities for keeping our home running, all while living on student loans is more stressful than anything I've ever done.  Not that I'm complaining, because I wouldn't change any of it for the world.  But none of that stress is likely to change any time in the near future.

I am finding one of the hardest parts of making major lifestyle changes is trying to break unhealthy habits that are a response to stress.  Making healthy choices while at the grocery store is much easier, at least for me, than walking away from my comfort food when I feel like pulling my hair out because the only person I've see in three days in 2 feet tall and doesn't talk yet, and I'm realizing that broke doesn't begin to describe what you are when trying to support a family of three on student loans. 

Obviously the easiest way to do this would be to elimiate the trigger from your life (and if anyone knows the winning numbers to this weeks lotto please feel free to share!) But since stress is likely to emerge in many different forms throughout our lives it is much healthier to break these bad habits and develop healthier comfort responses to use in the future.  And just like the bad habits that we've developed over many years, these changes in response will take time.

The first step to any change is recognition of the problem.  So for now I am puting down the ice cream and telling myself that this slip isn't the end of the world.  I will still reach my goals.  I will not feel guilty about falling off the wagon.  Tomorrow is a new day and a new chance to reinforce the healthy lifestyle that I am trying to create, and to figure out how I can respond to stress in a way that doesn't sabotage my health.

Monday 10/10/2011 Check-In

Starting Weight: 190.4
Last Week's Weight: 184.6
Current Weight: 186.7

Well, this week obviously wasn't a rip roaring success.  Yes, my weight is still lower than that first day I got on the scale and was shocked into action.  But a two pound increase over the last week was NOT what I wanted to see this morning.

I suppose it shouldn't come as much of a shock that I gained weight.  I ate far to much ice cream sandwiches, brownies and peach cobbler after the party this weekend.  And before that I wasn't exactly sticking to my meal plan.  But instead of giving up, like I would have a year ago, I am determined to stay the course and get my life changes on track.

After much deliberation I have decided that I am going to restart my diet, though with a few modifications.  I do feel that the South Beach Program is still the best fit for me, especially since the first two weeks are designed to help you purge the processed sugar from your system that cause you to crave more processed sugar.  But I obviously need something to which I must be accountable.

Therefore I am going to follow a modified Weight Watchers/South Beach Diet Plan.  Thanks to some very wonderful friends I have calculated that I need to consume at least 36 points per day since I am breastfeeding.  So while I am going to follow the South Beach Plan I am going to make sure that I don't go over my allotted Weight Watchers Points.  And if for some reason I slip up and eat something I shouldn't (like the left over peach cobbler I had for dessert tonight), as long as I am within my points I am not going to be too hard on myself.

The other change I am going to make is to prepare the majority of my daytime meals at night before I go to bed.  Having my snacks and lunch already assembled and easy to grab will make it easier for me to keep on track when I am running out the door to run errands or taking care of things around the house.  No more excuse to stop at McDonalds when I have my lunch packed with me.

So here's to a new week, and the hope that by next week's weigh in I'm at least 4 lbs lower than I currently am.  I seriously need to get back on track if I'm going to lose 25 lbs by Christmas Day.

Self Sabotage

Have you ever made the decision to make serious changes in your life only to fall flat on your face after just a couple of days?  This is a very real issue for me.  I make the determination that I am going to eat right and get in shape.  I make plans and lists and schedules.  I throw myself into it whole heartedly.  But after a few days I start to slack off.  It might be a quick McDonald's run while I'm out running errands, or a handful of chocolate chips because I'm CRAVING chocolate and just can't say no.  Then you start feeling guilty about those things, convinced that you are incapable of meeting your expectations.  And you give up.

That's where I was at last week after only 3 days of these changes I want to make.  I felt absolutely awful. It didn't help that we had a big party at our house on Friday night and when everyone left I had a house full of cookies and brownies and ice cream.  I am the first to tell you that when it comes to sweets I have no willpower.  Plus, if I was going to start over on Monday I really needed to eat all of this before then.

Recognizing these behaviors is the first step in figuring out how to make these major life changes. After all, if it wasn't for these behaviors I wouldn't have weighed a whopping 205 lbs before I delivered my son in May.  Determining the best way to deal with those behaviors so that you don't continue to sabotage yourself is another. And sticking to those changes... well, that's the whole idea behind making these major life changes.

So what are your self sabotaging behaviors?  And can you figure out a way to beat those behaviors so you can make a better life for yourself?

Week 1 Meal Plan

Monday
Breakfast: Veggie and cheese omelet, 2 pieces turkey bacon
Lunch: Salad with sliced chicken and balsamic vinagrette
Dinner: Tilapia with Roasted Tomato Sauce and garden salad
Snacks: Blackberry Yogurt, Celery with Laughing Cow Cheese, Chocolate Pudding

Tuesday
Breakfast: Poached Eggs, Turkey Bacon
Lunch: Chilled Tomato Bisque, Chopped Salad with Tuna
Dinner: Cracked Pepper Steak, Sauteed Onions, Peppers & Mushrooms, Salad
Snacks: Plum Tomato Halves with Mozzarella, Blueberry Yogurt, Raspberry Jello

Wednesday
Breakfast: Spicy Tomatillo Scramble, Turkey Bacon
Lunch: Sliced Steak on Garden Salad
Dinner: Lime Grilled Chicken with Salsa, Sweet Peas, Garden Salad
Snacks: Turkey Pepperoni with cheddar cheese, Vanilla yogurt, Chocolate pudding

Thursday
Breakfast: Pepper and Mushroom omelet, Turkey Bacon
Lunch: Cobb Salad
Dinner: Ginger-Dijon Gazed Pork Tenderloin, Steamed Cauliflower, Garden Salad
Snacks: Caprese Bites, Blueberry Yogurt, Raspberry Jello

Friday
Breakfast: Eggs over Easy, Turkey Bacon
Lunch: Ginger-Dijon Glazed Pork Tenderloin, Garden Salad
Dinner: Grilled Turkey Burgers, Steamed Broccoli, Garden Salad
Snacks: Celery Sticks with Laughing Cow Cheese, Raspberry Yogurt, Chocolate Pudding

Saturday
Breakfast: Mixed Veggie Omelet, Turkey Bacon
Lunch: Turkey Burger, Garden Salad
Dinner: Herb Crusted Flank Steak, Grilled Asparagus and Garlic, Garden Salad
Snacks: Cucumber slices with Laughing Cow Cheese, Vanilla Yogurt, Raspberry Jello

Sunday
Breakfast: Frittata with Canadian Bacon
Lunch: Chilled Tomato Bisque, Chopped Salad with Tuna
Dinner: Moroccan Lemon Chicken with Summer Squash, Garden Salad
Snacks: Cottage Cheese with Bell Peppers, Raspberry Yogurt, Chocolate Pudding

October's Goals

1) Start following South Beach Diet Supercharged Plan, including phase 1 of eliminating all carbs from my diet, and starting the Interval Walking/Total Body Workout plan

2) Aim to lose 2 lbs a week

3) Aim to drink at least 120 ounces of water per day, and reduce the amount of soda I drink daily to 1 can by the end of the month

4) Go to bed by 10pm each night

5) Meditate for at least 10 minutes each day

My Plan For Success

When I got on the scale last week I weighed a whopping 190.4 lbs. Yuck! Determined to put some serious changes into place I started making a list of everything that I want to change to make my body, and my life, better. 

1) Lose 55 lbs, with my goal weight being 135lbs.
2) Eat a healthier, well-rounded diet
3) Get my body into shape
4) Improve my mental balance through meditation and yoga

Obviously these are some pretty ambitious goals.  And if there is one thing that I have learned from my years of starting and stopping on this journey it's that each major goal needs to be broken down into manageable milestones. Each week I will do a weigh-in and track how much weight I have either gained or lost, and how well I stuck to my goals the week before.  In addition I will post my meal plan for the week, along with my planned exercise routine.  And each month I will review where I am at on my journey to a healthier life and set new goals for myself.

First day of the rest of my life

That sounds so melodramatic.  But really, that is what I want today to be. The first day of the rest of my life... a life that is filled with health and longevity.  And the only person who can make that happen is me.

Four months ago my husband and I welcomed our first son into the world.  It was an amazing experience, and being a mother has been a life changing experience for me. It has made me see the world, and myself, in a whole new light. And what I want above all else is to be here for as long as I can with him.

Anyone who knows me can tell you that I am overweight and don't take care of myself.  Well, starting today that is going to change.  I am going to start eating right and exercising.  I will provide a healthy example for my child.  I will encourage my husband to do the same, so that we have a better chance of growing old and watching our family grow together.  And maybe I'll be able to help someone else have the strength to make the same changes I am determined to.